...it's been, erm, over 3 months since my last blog.
What does this mean? That I am so dull that I have nothing to talk about? That I am so vacant that I have had no thoughts for 3 months? That I am such a busy person that I couldn't possibly have time to waste time on such fanciful things as blogging?
Nope. None of the above. I think, if I'm honest, it's that I've had so much on my mind I just haven't had the time to compose them into something meaningful and also something that i feel comfortable blogging. Not that anyone generally reads this but one can never be too careful.
How do you decide what you blog about? What makes a good blog? And what makes a blog interesting? Just how personal should you get? And if your thoughts will perhaps upset someone close to you, should you still share them with all and sundry? This I have thought a lot about and I'm still not sure if I've come to a good conclusion yet but what I do know is that as long as you're being honest and so long as you're happy to share those thoughts with the person you're blogging about too then i guess it's okay.
I think I need to stop over analysing things and just be honest. That is something I have learned over the last few months. The more you just keep it all in and dwell on your troubles then the worse these things will get. They just grow inside you out of all proportion until you start inventing problems and scenarios in your head that will probably never happen. I should know -I am the queen of reading too much into things. People that know me tend to think that I'm pretty up-front and will always stand up for myself and most of the time I will...except when it's really important! I've managed to successfully stay trapped in crap relationships because I'm too scared to speak up and equally I've managed to screw up some pretty good ones by not voicing certain concerns.
My unofficial New Years resolution was to sort myself out and I'm halfway there. Had a good 'cards on the table' chat with The Boyfriend in January. Well, I say 'good' ... it almost ended the relationship but in the end it didn't and we managed to be honest with each other. It has meant compromise and a certain amount of tolerance but we're getting there. All I need to do now is have a good talk to myself about my job and then I'll be golden!
Okay, it's late and I'm still slightly emotional about watching Notting Hill for the umpteenth time (see fairy tales can come true... well, if you are fairly wealthy and live in a pretty posh part of London with middle class friends anyway...) so I'll sign off for now with another [very late] New Years resolution to pay more attention to my terribly neglected blog.
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